Today is Day 33.
The Mirtazapine doping effect has worn off. I suspect there was still plenty in my system last night as I had a load of strange dreams. There may even be enough of a residue to have some effect on my mood this morning as I am a bit down but not to the ridiculous levels of the weekend.
I managed to go all the way to the post box on my own before lunch. This is the first time I have been out of the house on my own (other than driving places to meet people) in a month. I want to claim it as a success but it is less than 200m to the post box and I almost had to break into a run to get back in the house before I had another panic attack.
While I am counting the successes I have made an appointment to see my solicitor next Thursday to discuss taking out a restraining order. I want some of my life back and if it takes a court room and pissing off a lot of my "friends" to do it, then I have decided that is a price I am willing to pay. I have given them over a month to sort things out without getting drastic but their version of not-taking-sides is to spend all their time with her and force me out of the biggest parts of my life.
Today is Day 33.
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