A Better Friday

So it is't specifically Friday's. This week it was a Thursday instead.

In general the up and down nature of the week has continued with occasional periods approaching normality being tempered with returns to the crushing tear-filled lows. The lack of warning of when they are going to come is continually frustrating and almost outweighs the crying attacks themselves. Thursday in particular I was hit with one as I drove home. It wasn't entirely unexpected that I was going to struggle with an event-driven low at some point on Thursday after being treated to more disappointing news on Wednesday evening. 

If the attacks in the car keep getting more unpredictable I am going to have to consider whether I can still keep driving. None of them have caused a major problem so far, at least not that I know of, other drivers around me may have a different opinion. The increasing sudden-ness and lack of warning is getting to the point that soon I am going to have to stop somewhere that I am blocking a road rather than being able to pull off to the side.

Today hasn't been the best day but it hasn't been particularly bad either. The highlight of my day was reading an article on the BBC News site this afternoon. It is about someone else who was pushed to the brink of suicide by an event that other people have dismissed as insignificant. His job was put at risk, and despite being rich enough to never have to work again, the very idea of that change in his life impacted on him so much that he turned to drink, drugs and potential suicide.

No doubt he had people telling him that he was weak-willed, it's not like he had a history of doing things with his life that needed any effort of will. And no doubt he had people talking about how he was "crazy" (although since people only sneak around saying it to each other behind my back I sincerely doubt that anyone dared to say it to his face either).

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/boxing/15114640.stm


My "homework" from the hospital for this week was to spend 20minutes on the treadmill, and to go out for a short walk on my own. Two attempts at the second part and I still haven't managed to leave the house. I have set out my running kit for tomorrow morning in the hope that encourages me to at least attempt the first part.