Saturday I had a friend come to visit for a couple of hours. We even managed to go out to Asda for a coffee and some cake. Even with someone to look after me and a couple of shots of the supposedly calming herbal stuff I was still struggling with nerves and I had to rush through coffee so we could get back to my house. Doesn't count for my homework either as I am meant to go on my own. And I didn't even get near the treadmill either so still got both to do before Thursday.
I also had a good phonecall from a friend in the evening. I thought between the two of them they had done enough to cheer me up, as I was about as close to normal as I have been in the last few months. So I tried going to sleep in bed at a normal time. After another two and a half hours of not-sleeping again, I gave that up and came back to sleep on the sofa.
Today has been consistently crap from there. I should have been in Inverness, the last race that I had entered was today. A fast 10k on a downhill* course, should have been an easy sub-40 with the form I was in earlier this year. But I didn't even consider going to it. Instead I have been sat in front of the TV all day.
* Better be careful saying that too loud. Stating facts, to friends I have known for 20 years, is apparently not allowed any more without her friends jumping in to argue about them and have a go at me.
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